Acu Update

Nov. 13, 2014

Well, it was back to the TCM today and they seem to feel this is my "true" period. After chatting about my flow, she felt that my body was ridding itself of old blood, hence the long spotting from before. She saw the clear thermal shift on my chart, and since this blood was, well, like blood rather than thick and brown, it was a true flow. Not heavy, but there. Today it actually got a smidge heavier. I'm thinking the acupuncture may have done that.

When they took my pulse today, they said my "blood" is actually feeling pretty healthy. I was a bit confused, but you know me...I'm good at asking questions ;)

Basically, my right wrist is my Qi and my left wrist is my blood. My blood pulses were stronger today. My Qi channel is still low.

Acupuncture, as I've said before when I'm bleeding is super sensitive. The needle that really hurt today was the one over my right ovary. The left was definitely tender, but when she put the right one in, it felt like there was tremendous pressure in that area.

After acupuncture however, my Qi, per usual, it is drastically improved. I asked them if there is anything I can do to improve my Qi. Exercise? They told me that since I already exercise and am healthy that over exercising would actually deplete me more. They encouraged me once again to improve my "nutrition."

I've learned that this doesn't mean overall nutrition to them. It means proteins. She kept telling me to eat chicken soup. A bit confused I pressed the issue and they told me, "you know, boil a chicken."

"Ahhhhh. So, you want me to eat bone broth?"

Yes! They also said to make sure I am getting plenty of calcium, eggs, fish, meat and to add protein powder to my diet. My hubby has organic protein powder, so I'll be digging into that. She also told me to start eating my goji berries again.

So, off I went to the Asian market. Now, this part, gulp, will make you queasy.  I was already thinking in my head I should have ordered more organic goji berry powder or organic goji berries from Amazon, but figured I didn't want to wait for it to arrive, so I better just get it from the store. I was a bit uneasy them probably not being organic, but for a quick fix until I get my order in, they'd have to suffice.

I went in, got my berries and headed to the car. Thankfully, I went to open it since I hadn't had lunch and thought it'd be a nice snack on the way home. AND THERE WAS A MAGGOT IN THERE!!!! I almost lost my cookies.

I went back in and tried to discretely tell the woman working there what happened. She saw the smooshed critter right there in the bag, so she gave me a new bag. I just stood there in disgust. Um, what if there's one in here. "No, no, this is fresh batch" she said pulling it out of the freezer section.

All I could think on the way home is #1, I will not be telling my husband this happened, he will be appalled (hello sweetie if you ever read this...) and #2, I am either going to freeze these suckers or gobble them up before anything can hatch. And #3 - I am buying the organic powder from now on. I know nothing is hatching in there.

So, as I type this, I'm sitting with my feet soaking and my castor oil pack doing it's thing on my belly. I feel kind if refreshed that it's a true new cycle. I mean, I guess I will never know for sure, but it feels a lot more like a true cycle than that stint of spotting did.

I've still been reading my book It Is Finished by Nerida Walker, but not as quickly as I should be. It's been insanely hectic with work. I think I mentioned before my sister-in-law and I are thinking of opening an Etsy shop for all natural beauty care products? We've been making headway on it. Stay tuned, I'll post a link when it's up and running if you want to try any of our stuff.

Until then, hang in there and God Bless.

If any of you ladies reading want to ever share your journey, don't be a stranger. I know sometimes it's easier and safe to just read others journeys, but we can all learn and encourage each other.

Acu update, Spotting and Investigating Adoption

Oct. 30, 2014

Well, onwards and upwards. It was back to TCM today to share with them the "period" and my new labs. They were happy with the progress. Although they'd have liked heavier blood flow, something is better than nothing. My sentiments exactly. My pulse was a bit stronger today, and nice and strong after my session.

She told me a peculiar thing though. To keep my feet warm. I had no idea that could alter a menstrual cycle, but she showed me how she always wore pantyhose even with sandals because your feet should always stay warm. Out of curiosity, I googled it. Apparently when you bleed you are most vulnerable so TCM says to not go barefoot and avoid swimming in cold water. Here is a link.

https://www.acufinder.com/Acupuncture+Information/Detail/ABCs+of+Fertility+Acupuncture,+Babies,+Chinese+Medicine+-+Part+1

I go around barefoot all the time, so I guess I'll be more conscious of that. I do love my slippers in the winter though, so just another excuse to get my annual pair of Snoozies. Have you tried this things?? You will fall in love.

My session was definitely more relaxed today. I was early, no stressors and I could just lay there. It heart like the dickens though. I won't like. The needles over my ovaries felt like daggers going in! "Hurt?" she asked. "Yes!!" I asked if it was because I was bleeding and she said yes. I'm very sensitive right now because of it. Sweet sassy molassy! She was right!

She was also happy with my labs. Although no beautiful numbers, they were drastically better than last time. And the beauty is, it was done naturally coaxing my body back into health without meds to mask symptoms. I like that.

Something else I feel I should share, full disclosure and all, is I started sending away for information on adoption. The cost of it all makes me want to cry, but we've never been opposed to adopting. I found a few nice Christian agencies (not that we are opposed to others, but these are non profit and I've moral issues with going some of the larger ones that work for profit) in this area. Some of which foster to adopt.

Fostering to adopt is something I'm not certain we want. The big reason - my heart can only handle so much heartache and bringing a child into our family that could leave would devastate me.

Adopting costs upwards of $35,000. A lot of agencies look a lot lower until you read into the "additional" costs. An adoption that looks to be $25,000 after the agency "fees" in usually about $10,000 more. It's all very overwhelming.

I did email our accountant though to discuss the adoption tax credits and how they are applied, so I do know we could get tax dollars back the year it is finalized. There are also numerous grants for me to research if we do decide to proceed in this direction.

There is also the adoption to adopt an embryo. I know my doctors had told me DE IVF, which is donor egg IVF with the egg fertilized with my husbands sperm, but I didn't realize how many families have undergone IVF and are putting their other embies up for adoption. I like that. Because otherwise, those little babes would never have a chance. But again, it is about a $10,000 fee to adopt them (none of which goes to the family by the way - just the agencies!!) and then you pay for the IVF procedure.

The funny thing is, before I never wanted to look seriously into the matter because I felt I was "giving" up on conceiving, but now all of a sudden, I don't feel that way at all. I feel very at peace with we will have another biological child, but this whole journey, with all my prayer, has also given me a certain peace bringing a child into our home another way. I just wish it wasn't so much money. It's staggering really.

So, after all that rambling, I don't know if adoption is a realistic avenue for our family, but I want to research it as best I can. I know we've a spot in our heart and family for a child. I've an odd peace we will conceive and have a healthy baby, but I've always been a bit type "A" in preparing for every outcome.

So, it is CD5 and I'm very optimistic this cycle. I feel good. I'm encouraged my estrogen levels are higher increasing my odds to ovulate, and I'm ensuring I eat well, get good rest and do my best to center myself mentally and spiritually.

Since I KNEW I had not ovulated recently and am not pregnant, I started my castor oil pack yesterday. I did it while I was working. Thankfully my husband was at class, otherwise I'm sure he'd have given me a strange look to come down stairs and find me without pants sitting on a garbage bag (to catch castor oil) with a pack sitting on my stomach! I also started taking my evening primrose and red raspberry leaf tea again. I never do when I even think I may have ovulated because I want to avoid uterine contractions.

I also got an early Christmas present. A nutribullet!! I've been juicing for the past few months, but my motor was shot and it's been tough to schedule with my friend juicing, so I researched different options and decided on the nutribullet because I think drinking the fiber is important too. So, I've been downing my organic veggies for easy absorption the past few days. Nice thing is, my family is hooked too, so it's a good way to get a variety of vitamins and minerals down the hatch. I know proper eating is essential to fertility!!

I've also been listening to Nerida Walker a lot. I play her in the background while I work to center myself when I need to. I think her ministry is amazing!

Off topic, I've continued making my homemade items and I'm falling in love with all of them. My sister-in-law has been doing the same. We've tossed around the idea of starting to sell some small scale to see how people like them. Who knew all these health problems would open so many doors, right? She has three kids and we're both adamant we give our kids the best outlook at a healthy future. I don't want my child to ever suffer health problems from exposure to toxins like I have. I know they come into contact with thousands a day, so if I can do a small part to limit that, you can be assured I will!

God Bless!

Back to Acu and Herbs

Oct. 24, 2014

This morning I woke up, and although I intended to take an HPT and OPK because I was heading in to acupuncture, I completely forgot. It's been nice not worrying about that stuff. I did take one with second morning urine before I left, and Hallelujah, Praise God, the HPT AND OPK WERE NEGATIVE!!! Why do I get so excited by that? It's been FIVE MONTHS (!!) since both were negative. That means great things for my hormones!

That was where my excitement ended for the day. I went in yesterday for an appointment with my TCM. I was a bit disheartened that although she said my pulses were ok, they were a bit weaker than my last visit. I feel though in context, I should rewind and give a brief overview of my week.

Without going into mind numbing detail, my husband almost lost his job this week so my stress level was a bit high to say the very least. Someone at work had falsely accused him of some things and while the "investigation" was underway, tensions were high in the household. That was resolved Weds evening.

Thursday was my appointment and it was honestly just one of those mornings where everything just was going wrong. It took me 25 minutes to get milk at the grocery store because of a faulty cash register. I was late getting on the road. Traffic was horrendous. I had a deadline to be home for my husband's workshop at school, and to top it off my TCM forgot about me. I called them and they hussled over, but my leisurely hour and a half appointment was reduced to 35 minutes.

When they read my pulse, I was frayed. As they started going on about how I should have my levels retested with the doctor because although I'm better than when I started, my channels will get stronger, than a bit weaker, than stronger, etc, but never up to perfect. Because it's been 9 months, they wanted to see the progress I'm making, I officially blurted out "Can my pulse be reading lower than it is from stress? I keep looking at the clock and I need to leave in 40 minutes."

Wide eyed they hussled me into the room and started poking me with needles as I frantically texted my husband to see if there was a workshop later in the afternoon he could take. Nope. Ugh.

She asked her questions and looked at my tongue while poking me.

To say I was trying desperately to hold back tears in an understatement. As soon as she walked out, they started pouring down my face. The gravity of what she said hit me. It's been nine months and they are feeling frustrated by lack of progress. She came back in to ask me how my appetite has been and I know she saw the tears. She didn't quite know what to say, and I felt like an idiot.

This session I kept repeating the mantra "I am healthy. I am healed" as I took deep breaths and reminding myself of some scripture passages that deal with fertility and fruitfulness. As it neared my 35 minutes, because that was all that time allowed, I was feeling a bit calmer about things. She came in to take my pulse and her eyes got wide, she gave me a smile and said "Better. Better. Good. It's good!"

We went back in the other room where I would pay and get my herbs and she told her husband, who translated to me that my pulse was a LOT stronger after my session. The circulation was much better and much stronger. They encouraged me to keep doing yoga and exercising to increase my circulation to get better blood flow to my reproductive organs, and I hustled out the door to fight traffic home with a new batch of herbs and to return next week for acupuncture.

The herbs this week are not pleasant. Sometimes it has a sweeter smell to it, but this batch smells more medicinal. It almost tastes like there is celery seed in there, but much stronger. Some batches are easier to swallow than others. This is not one of them.

I was feeling overly emotional and frustrated yesterday but I really took a moment to center myself yesterday. I feel good. I feel healthy. I've been praying and trusting and having faith this last month and it has brought me incredible peace and strength. Why was I letting my "natural" and "medical" circumstances doubt what I know to be true in my heart. I've put the negative feelings to the side and have decided to keep reminding myself and declaring to the universe, to God and everyone else that I am healed.

Last night, I started spotting. Just a tiny bit. I'm not entirely sure if that means my period is coming, or just breakthrough spotting again, but seeing my body "work" is such a wonderful thing.

In terms of my cycle, I still don't know what's happening. My temp today for instance was 97.18 at 4:10 am when I work, but I took it again at 6 am out of curiosity and it was 97.86. Make me wonder if my chart looks so erratic because the last week or so, some days I've been able to sleep until 5:15 or 5:30 which may inflate my temperatures more than I thought. If I use the BBT adjuster to allow for temping at different times, it isn't that wide a gap. My body just must run low until it hits a certain point in the morning.

So, nothing new to report really. I keep debating if I want to have the doctors run more tests. I know I don't want it midcycle because my LH and FSH will always look inflated then...they would with any woman. If I start my period, I may consider it on CD3, which is when all hormonal testing should be taken. But, in all honesty, I don't know if I want it. Will a medical measurement bring me peace or anxiety and stress? Part of me wants to just trust, know and believe that it will happen and not have any news that makes me doubt it. But, just hearing myself say that shows I must have doubt about what the numbers will present.

Anyway, I'm undecided. I see so many woman in these support groups agonize over their numbers and I can't imagine the stress being good.

God Bless!

Acu Update and Faint Positives

Sept. 15, 2014

Well, Saturday was back to acupuncture. Good news, my pulses were stronger at the start, and even stronger after the pricks. Still not perfect, but going in the right direction. She added another needle to the formation which was about one inch above my belly button. I still haven't quite found that point in any of my fertility books or online, but she seems to know what it's for. I have to remind myself she's treating the whole body, not just fertility. She tells me every time it's to increase Qi, menstruation and pregnancy.

I had my husband snap a picture of my stomach post treatment. This time, they seem to be more red, and one actually bruised. Ironically, the only one that really hurt, you can barely see.

Here is a link that will help you identify the points and why they are stimulated. The photo of the abdomen is almost identical to where she poked me except she did the three points above my naval. About one inch above center and two pokes about two inches above and to either side.

http://www.natural-health-for-fertility.com/acupressure-for-fertility.html#.VBb9f_ldU1I

If you scroll down she also did the Epang II spots as well as one spot directly above the Yintang but into my hairline.

The following images are from the book The Infertility Cure by Randine Lewis, which I've recommended time and time again. She shows ALL the various fertility points and what they do. I'm just using these images to show which my acupuncturist used.

She used the LV point, in previous visits when she KNOWS I have not ovulated, she has also used the KI4

This visit, she used the SP 10, SP 8 and ST 36, she has used numerous others on other visits, including Ki 3,Sp 6. I've used acupressure on SP 9 before under their direction.

Although they have not done acupuncture in my ear before, I do stimulate both of these spots every night during meditation. They are good for stress relief.

My acupuncturist also does two spots between my thumb and forefinger to increase Qi.

The Infertility Cure is excellent because it shows all the spots, gives detailed information about each spot, how it should be stimulated and WHEN and also discusses which spots should be used for each specific condition of infertility.

Amazing stuff! I go back next Saturday again for acupuncture and a new batch of herbs. Then back one more time. They go to China for three weeks following that and will stock me on herbs and we will decide if I need more sessions of acupuncture when they return.

In other news, I tested last week to faint positives. My in-laws, awesome as they are came to town to watch my son on Saturday night so my husband and I could do a mini overnight vacation to see a comedy fest. I decided not to use OPK's or pregnancy tests all weekend and just relax.

I did test this morning and still faint positives and a blaring positive OPK. So, I'm just riding this out. I think I'll just test OPKs every few days now since I think I'm having a POF LH surge. Best not to waste my money and no reason to create anxiety.

Although FF still has my temps as O'ing 16 days ago, I'm fairly certain I didn't. My cervix is still firm and closed, but I am assured with that since it spent the last two months wide open. My feeling is, my body is sorting itself out and regrouping. Next time it opens, I hope will be the real deal.

Until then, I've really reflected on the message about resting in the Lord, and I have. Oddly enough, I've had no anxiety about it. My baby is around the corner. I know it.