More Spotting, Say What?

Nov. 10, 2014

Well, I suppose an update is overdue. If you recall, last I left you, I was having the world's shortest (flow) longest (lasting) period. So, I spotted brown for three days, bled a few hrs, then spotted pink / brown on and off for nine more days. Right now, I'm on CD16 (I started CD1 the day of red blood flow, er, trickle.)

Last night, I had a miniscule bit of spotting. Not even enough for a liner, and today the same thing. Looking at my chart, I'm starting to wonder if that was just hormonal mid cycle spotting before and maybe my period is coming? Or, maybe I'm just doing the whole spotting now? Ovulating now? Tough to tell. Here is my chart thus far. If I'd been later in my cycle, I may have thought I ovulated on CD4, and for all I know, maybe I did. If CD1 wasn't CD1, it was in the middle of a long cycle.

Time will tell I suppose.

I did go in for acupuncture and an herb update last Thursday. They said my pulses were stronger. I had more "Jayu." My feeble attempt at sounding out the word they told me is Chinese for "power." My pulse after my session was even better.

Bonus, my herbs are MUCH better this time. The last batch was by far the worst I've had to choke down. With the start of the new cycle, I added vitex back into my mix. I know I'd told you I'd added maca back in a few months ago and bee pollen a while back. I also switched from an every other day dose of royal jelly to two days on, one day off with propolis instead. As always, research your bee products. I attached link to pretty reputable companies. I try to buy mine locally to support local farms, but I've resorted to the links above as well.

Before company arrived I did three days of castor oil packs and soaked my feet every night as well as doing my femoral massage at night after meditating. I stopped about a week in though because I don't want to risk doing that after ovulation.

I've also kept on researching adoption options. Conclusion, WAY WAY WAY too expensive the traditional route. We've been keeping an open mind about fostering to adopt, and more probably adopting embryos. I really like the idea of giving babies who have no chance, a chance. And, I really did love being pregnant. 

Other pluses about that would be I can control everything that goes into my body prenatally and would be able to breastfeed which is really important to me. Also turns out it's about 1/3 of the cost of adopting a child, even after adding in the medical procedures and medicines. 

As much as I look into this, I feel it's not for us just yet. I feel strongly we'll have a biological baby. But, I'll be honest, even if we do, the idea of it is not off the table for the future.

God bless! 

Cycle Day 142

Oct. 19, 2014

Well, two people in two days have contacted me for updates, so I feel as though it's high time I post here.

There isn't a whole lot to report. Today officially marks the 142nd day of this cycle. I'm part of a mom group who has a 2ww (two week wait) thread on Facebook and several of the girls who I started it with are entering their third trimesters now, which is rather eye opening. Heck, several are finding out the sex of their baby since my last period. Oct. 31 will be five months of this unending cycle. THAT is crazy to me. Several moms pop on to the thread only to get pregnant the first month. It thrills me, but sometimes I just shake my head and think "if only I were that lucky!!"

I try not to let that get me down though. Although I didn't try very long for my son, I'm well aware had I gotten pregnant one or two months before I did, I wouldn't have this amazing little guy in my life, so when I DO get pregnant, I know it will be the right time then too.

My TCM doctor is still in China. She returns tomorrow I believe and they start seeing patients on the 22nd. Right now, my appointment is Saturday, but if my husband has some days off this week, I will try to get in sooner. My herbs should last another two days or so. I added vitamin C to the mix as it's support to be a super fertility antioxidant and elongate the LP.

I'm trying to remember if I updated you that I'm back on maca. I started back on it a month ago and it seems like it's helped things. I also added bee propolis back in, but only twice a week. I know the royal jelly was warming (which I only take every other day) but I know the propolis is suppose to be good, so I started small. The resveratrol the TCM suggested seems to be working great, or maybe it's just things were evening out already, but I'm keeping with it.

The good news is, my HPT's are still stark white, which is excellent. The OPKs are still dark, but the last time I tested, I had fertile signs. I'm only testing every 10-14 days now. My temps have actually been high the past few days. I did miss a day because my son woke up with a nightmare at 3:30 and by the time I got him to sleep, it was silly to try and temp an hour later when he woke. We'll see what happens over the next week or so.

My new philosophy has really been "Let go and let God" and to tell you the truth, I feel more at ease that way.

Although I can do the things I feel God directs me to do like take care of my body with exercise, organic diet, less toxins, and taking nourishing herbs and supplements, I obviously can't "will" my body to pop out an egg (or that would have happened over a year ago) so why obsess over it. The reality is, it will take a MIRACLE to get pregnant. It's a good thing I believe in miracles. I really have a calm about things and faith that God will provide.

I did order all my goods to start my homemade items which I'm excited to try. I'm particularly pumped to make my magnesium body butter. Many people have magnesium insufficiencies, those with POF in particular. Because POF has high risk of osteoporosis, it's important to get adequate calcium, vitamin D and to ensure it's being absorbed. Magnesium does that. It also, from what I read, helps you sleep. I'm going to make a batch up and spread it on my feet before bed. My sister in law did a body butter with cocoa butter and added peppermint which is genius. Chocolate peppermint anyone??

I also got all the goods for my chapstick, lotions, shampoo, conditioner, mouthwash and sunscreen. I actually gave a sample of my deodorant to a friend and she fell in love with it. She's pushing me to open my own business. It's a bit daunting to me, so I told her I'd start just by making stuff for friends if they want it. I was happy to hear that she loved it and said it worked for her better than any retail variety.

All in all, I'm feeling really good. I had a few sleepless nights, but it was more concern for my sick baby and work/ financial concerns. I just had a wonderful weekend full of family fun and am so incredibly grateful for all the blessings surrounding me.