Sometimes God has a different path in store for us. After being diagnosed with POF, I set out on a journey to "repair" my body and get pregnant naturally. Somewhere along the line, although pristine health and self care is my goal, the necessity to "prove" the doctors wrong became less important and we sought the perfect solution to grow our family. We decided on Embryo Donation / Adoption. Read about our journey. Blessings!

1dp5dt

Feb. 17, 2016

Well, one day down. Almost. Feeling good. Having really bad cramps. I'm trying to remember last time if they were this bad. Since it was a negative last time, I assume it was either from the procedure or the embryo had implanted and just arrested. I'll never know. I DO know that today, I'm having really bad cramping. It started super low like little bursts and has just morphed into really bad menstrual like cramps all over. Just dull and achy. Whenever I get up, I just feel sore and like there is a lot of pressure.

Other than that, I feel good. I didn't do the whole bedrest thing this time. I took it easy yesterday and was a couch potato watching shows, but I refused to work to limit stress. It was nice! My son came and snuggled with me before bed and I read him stories on the couch. I slept downstairs as well. I did want to avoid the stairs the first day - maybe a silly precaution, but that was one thing my RE was rather adamant about and I didn't want those "what if" feelings. I will admit it was nice to sleep without my son waking me. Fell to dad last night ;) Hm...maybe I need another night without the stairs, eh?

Last night it was very sweet. My husband pulled out the photo of the embryo at dinner and explained to our son that we called it a "snowflake" and it was tiny tiny and hopefully someday would be a baby. We explained it was in mommy's tummy and mommy couldn't pick him up for a little bit. After dinner, when we were on the couch, he lifted up my shirt and laid his head on my tummy. He kissed it. Melts my heart. I hope that little guy / gal in there is snuggling in deep. He / she has an amazing big brother waiting for them.

This morning, my son came down to wake me and we snuggled and watched cartoons and I got him ready. My husband dropped him at school, but I'm picking him up tonight. I've just been working from the couch today making sure to get up every few hours to get the blood pumping.

I started the Lovenox last night. Not too bad. I will say it stings to push that needle in, but it does to the rear as well. The Lovenox goes into your fat in your stomach. You have to basically squish it up and stab it in there. I think it actually stings more because you are watching it go in and have to give it a good shove. It did bruise a tiny bit - it just looks like a blood blister. It bled more than the intramuscular ones in my butt. I'm thinking the nurse was right and I'll have to move to my legs at some point. I'll have to take a photo later into this process. My stomach will be riddled with bruised dots. lol

An amazing thing yesterday. We received an anonymous donation. It came with a beautiful hand written note. Someone's uncle had passed away. They decided to give us a portion of the estate he left as he'd have wanted to gift it to a couple seeking the adoption process. They commented how he may not have understood this method, but getting with the times and all... lol. It was neat to hear about his life and his quirky personality. I've saved it to put in a memory box for our little Snowflake. We've so many things to share with him or her when they are older about how wanted they are, how blessed we are to have them in our family.

It was really neat to get and my husband and myself continuously find ourselves thanking God and amazing at how blessed we've been. A month ago, I remember crying and not knowing how we would do all this. I honestly made a decision one day to lay it at God's feet and found peace. I will never stop being amazed at how God works. There is no problem to big or too small.

Well, gearing up for my next shot and keeping my feet up and warm while I finish out the work day and can go get my son.

God bless!

2 comments:

  1. Praying for you, as always!

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  2. Thank you, Jen! That means so much to me! I updated our blog today. It was successful. God be praised!

    ReplyDelete